oxy moron

. . . incomprehension of the intensity of this emotion - a way i'm made to feel i wouldn't have thought possible as a result of you.

what we've left undone for so long lets me know that she's been waiting for a chance to breathe . . .

haven't we all?

the weight i feel is beyond unexpected - in entirety i'm nearly bereft . . . yet strangely abundant.

devel

I gets no love from boys with blue eyes,

boys with blue eyes tend to make me cry.

I gets no love from boys with blue eyes . . .

Lord only knows why.

my neck and my back

. . . the pull, the pinch . . . the searing indication of a form reaching another point of it's existence, one where elasticity indicates that there is a breaking point.

reach that edge.
now slice yourself and lick the wound.

. . .

pleasebabybabypleasebabypleasepleasepleasebabybaby . . . .

funeral pyre

What makes you come here to seek what you're looking for? I suppose my patterns are indeed in need of re-configuration, because it struck me as unnecessary for there to be any more than the remnants I believed we made ceremony for and bid farewell.

Maybe it was just me . . . .

Correction: It was just me.

The ceremony I needed, and so it was what I constructed: placing you across from me, making attempts to catch my gaze over the coffin. Only once I allowed us to engage; selfishly to retain a final memory of your beauty - heightened by regalia.

. . .

There was no goodbye.

There was only me coping. And healing. And healed.

And you forgotten.

. . .

for the most part

Aung San Suu Kyi

Having just had that moment when I realize the greater extent of human existence and the need for continual perspective when falling into the 'wallowing world.'

So many 'what ifs!'

So many ways my life may have been a thing of unprecedented, indisputable tragedy . . . .

To ever cease in celebrating that it's absolutely not strikes me deeply . . . shakes me unsettled and wrings out tears.

. . .

Just one story, just one country. Just IMAGINE . . . .
http://www.thefreedomcampaign.org/takeaction.php

in session

". . . as a matter of fact it did matter, although not as much as i led on . . . ."

Do you believe in 'the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?' Yeah, neither do I, but still, I'd like to retain some level of face-value when it comes to self-expression; mine and that of others as well.

You've let me know countless times that this is, indeed, asking too much. So at what point do I learn my lesson?

I suppose when I enroll in a different course.

moment no. 11

. . . more of that stuff they call love - the thing they say is free . . . am i supposed to ask for it still?

perhaps i'm not ready yet to offer up my pride as tender - i'd rather have you up on the auction block, going for pennies and a hayride . . .

nothing sweet to be found in this bitter, nothing sweet to be sought either - the sheer indulgence in the emotions i've allowed myself to fold into . . . to succumb

scum

minus the 's' steers clear of me nonetheless

. . .

what a contraption to be enveloped in the conviction of righteousness . . . pure tomfoolery, fool-hardily expressed and indulged . . .

throw the goddamn baby out with the bathwater already.